Monday, March 19, 2018

The wordiness of it all!

Yes we’ve heard that sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words…..SOMETIMES being the operative word.  Please don’t post a picture of toast with scrambled eggs when you can write, ‘My lazy arsed, miserly, husband made me this breakfast at 11 am after I nagged him all night for not buying flowers on our anniversary while I slogged and made a fabulous dinner, wore my best dress and he decided to watch a game of darts on telly without so much as a thank-you.’



If you want a reaction out of me, don’t swallow a camera and then post pics of your insides. “I’m pregnant” is a perfectly acceptable way to elicit Congratulations from me and your other gazillion followers! I’ll be happy for you minus the vomit in my mouth. There’s a reason why consultations with a doctor happen in private. Because they’re private. They should remain that way. Share your ultrasound pic with whoever else cares, don’t assume that I’m THAT interested in your child that I’d want to meet him BEFORE he’s born. There’s a reason you’re my virtual friend. I’m not even interested in YOU that much. 



You’d think we have the Kardashians to blame for this. Nah. Methinks it’s the Oprahfication of the world ; sharing minutiae of your daily existence. I use this hand cream, and I feature my favorite things on my page and ooooh I save my bread in aluminum foil, and this is the tree under which I sit with my book, is  endearing when she’s a billionaire on T.V.  But when your next door neighbor starts tweeting and instagramming her ‘painless ways to tweeze out chin hairs’ or when you have to endure 5000 pictures of  dogs, cats and lizards staring into space or doing nothing as they are wont to not do, you want to go back in time and smash the phone camera prototype.


5 comments:

  1. hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha..... way to go girl.....!!!!!!!!!!

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  2. Hitting the nail on the head, then hammering it all the way in....????!!!!!!! You go, girl... loved it..!!

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  3. Enjoyable and hard hitting.

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